It has been almost exactly two months since my last blog post, so it felt like time for another one. There are lots of reasons for the relative drought, but I won’t bore you with those. The most compelling one is that I have been busy being a dad. And playing Dr. Mario. And trying to keep track of The Baron’s binky.
We have lots of pet names for Mr. Baby (also known as Baby #2). For now, we will call him Baron Von Poopy Pants or simply The Baron. For those concerned individuals who read my last blog, the amount and frequency of poop has subsided, as expected although the odor has not.
I came up with the title for this post in kind of a hurry and when I read it upon review, I realized it might be interpreted different than my intention. So just to clarify, for those of you who thought I was considering eating a baby for Thanksgiving, rest assured, the thought never crossed my mind.
What I mean by No Baby for Thanksgiving is this: Our first foster placement ended just before Thanksgiving.
Over a week has gone by and what we initially expected to be a 3-4 day placement has been at least twice that long! Due to the nature of foster placements, I don’t feel like it is prudent to publicly share too many specifics. For that reason baby will just be baby and I will use gender neutral pronouns.
I’m going to take a break this week from the traditional adoption vs fostering to adopt posts I have been doing.
I am also going to start off with a confession. We weren’t contacted by a birth mother. We were contacted by TWO. On Thursday we received notification that our home is now licensed for foster care. And then yesterday we were contacted by someone who wasn’t a birth mother about another adoption. We still need some more details on that one, but all this combined with looking at adoption exchanges the last week as made me realize something.
I am so very grateful for the love and support shown by friends and family in the comments when I shared my last post on Facebook. Something that became clear to me however is that I left folks with the impression that we weren’t sure which option to choose. While that is true we will have to make that decision, it isn’t going to be now.
We are choosing BOTH for now. The hard decision is when once a child is going to be placed in our home. And really it may turn out we don’t really have a choice in the matter.
After five years of feeling like we had so little progress in traditional adoption, we decided pursue something we had always wanted to do after we had already started our family, i.e. become foster parents with the goal of adopting.
But now, seemingly out of the blue, we have been contacted by a birth mother. Coincidentally, this happened right around the time we were finalizing our foster care licensing. Will the adoption work out? We have no idea. But the timing of all of this is leading to some very difficult decisions. As a result of such, I thought it would be good to do a series of blog posts about some of the differences between traditional adoption and adoption through foster care.
I’m terrible at this blogging thing. There’s no way to get better without trying though, right?
We started process to become licensed as foster parents this year. We are almost there! It is definitely a different path from traditional adoption, but it is something we were always considering.
After so many years of waiting with no results, we have finally heard from a birth mother! It is still far too early to know if things will work out. I know so many who had too many false starts on this, but it is hard to not be a little more excited than we probably should be.
Okay, there is a start. Hopefully our next post won’t be when our children start school college.